Nuns On The Run

A lot of movies lack for originality and draw their inspiration from, or blatantly rip off earlier, more successful efforts. This movie is one such celluloid piece of pilfery and whilst it does borrow really quite heavily from Some Like it hot it is a good movie in it's own right.

Brian and Charlie are two small time crooks working for a vicious Mr Big. They want to get out out the crime game but their guvnor wants them to carry out a dangerous robbery, ripping off Triads. They use this as a cover for stealing the money and doing a runner from their psycho boss. However, things go awry and they are forced to hide out in a convent and dress up as nuns. One of them falls for a someone staying at the small medical wing and the other gets very into being a nun. Eventually their boss, the Triads and the police all catch up with them and they go on the run again, this time making their escape to Rio, via an airport.

That really is about it as far as the plot goes, it certainly is a very undemanding film. The setting is very dated, but then again the film is nearly 20 years old. Filmed mostly on location in and around West London there are scenes that provide big belly laughs but mostly the comedy is more of the gentle smile variety than laughs variety. As a football fan I was also pleased to see a small scene filmed in the car park of Stamford Bridge but then again that's probably just me that's pleased by that.

This is a fun if not exactly sophisticated British film, one that I feel has been ignored by some, a kind of forgotten gem if you will. You could certainly do worse than spend 90 minutes watching this. It's really quite good fun.

Jurassic Park

This movie kicked off a trend that's still going on today, namely the summer blockbuster that boasts jaw dropping special effects. Each year tries to outdo the last and sometimes to the cost of the story and movie itself. So do we have a lot of blame to lay at the door of this movie? No we do not so let me elucidate. The story here is central and the effects, whilst also essential are there because of the story, not the other way around.

By now I think most people will have seen this one so I wont waste a whole heap of your time going over the plot, suffice it to say a venture capitalist has the bright idea of resurrecting dinosaurs using DNA extracted from their fossils in order to create a theme park. Once he gets things up and running he brings in some people to give the park the once over. Only thing is, something goes wrong, very badly wrong.

From a relatively slow start the film builds up a good head of pace and by the end it is a frenetic race for survival. The first proper reveal of a dinosaur is a proper jaw-dropping moment and you're left wondering just how they did it as the dinosaurs in question and throughout the film look utterly convincing. As i have already mentioned, the effects are driven by a damned good story and that's a trademark of the director, some chap called Steven Spielberg. In this movie he touches on themes of peril and adventure although there is a slightly underlying touch of ecologically aware preachyness, in that mankind really shouldn't interfere in nature.

The criticisms I have of this film and they are minor ones at that are that some of the writing can be a little bit clunky at times and some of the characterisation is a little shallow. Also there are occasions of blatant product placement that jars somewhat. On the plus side the child actors in this movie pull off the rare trick of being likeable and most of the other protagonists match up to their example. On your first viewing there thrills and jumps aplenty but they pale a little on repeat viewings. The special effects were groundbreaking for the time but they have been surpassed by now but at the same time the story more than makes up for that.

Jurassic Park more than stands up to minor criticisms and you will find yourself returning to it time and time again.

Naked Gun

There are some actors I can watch endlessly, a pantheon of greats if you'll allow. People like Robert Englund, Jack Lemmon, Alec Guiness and the star of this film, the wonderful Leslie Nielsen who sadly died a few days ago.

Nielsen is Frank Drebin, a good natured but bumbling and accident prone cop who investigates the near death of a friend of his. I say that but really the plot is almost secondary here to the onslaught of jokes. This film is very much the vein of spoofs, a vein opened up by the Zucker-Abrahams-Zucker trio. The trick with their movies is that unlike Scary Movie, they'll play it absolutely straight, as if the main characters really are cops in a proper action film. This gives rise to some superb double takes from those involved as they check that they've just heard what they think they have. The master of this is Leslie Nielsen who can make your sides split with laughter just with a single glance to camera.

This movie stands up to repeat viewings, just for jokes you may have missed, jokes that happen in the background. It's also worth watching the credits, as unlike with other movies, these credits are a continuation of the comedy with jokes and puns inserted in amongst the actual job titles. That's not to say that the rest of the film isn't up to scratch. This movie rocks and is easily in my top 3 of comedy films. There are slapstick moments like a murderous doctor riding a missile launcher into a fireworks factory or Lieutenant Drebin accidentally killing a fish with pen. There are lines that make one roar out loud with laughter with the the incomparable "Nice beaver!" line being a favorite of mine.

Leslie Nielsen is a great loss to the world of movies, for he gave us so much. However there is no greater testament to his memory than the wonderful films he left us with. He may be gone but his work lives on.

Batman Begins

This is not a movie that continues the franchise started by Tim Burton's Batman movie of the early 90's. This is a reboot of the Caped Crusader and this movie takes an altogether more dark, almost gothic tone as opposed to Burton's comic book style.

Batman himself is played by Christian Bale who adds a very sombre, brooding tone, in keeping with the movie. He is a chiseled chap, not a nancy-boy and you can really buy into him as the flawed hero. There are moments in this movie where Bruce Wayne/Batman's vulnerability shines through and that's a great testament to Bale. Gotham, Batman's hometown also adds a lot to this movie instead of being just a backdrop. The massively tall buildings and dark alleyways make the humans living there seem almost insignificant and powerless, a metaphor for the struggle against the corruption of the police etc.

In keeping with the current vogue for rebooting movies franchises, we get much more of a backstory. We learn of how Bruce Wayne became the Caped Crusader and of how he fomented his hate of crime. This is done well enough to leave one somehow connected to both him and the other characters, from Alfred the butler to James Gordon the only good cop left in Gotham. This movies plot moves from Batman's early years to his formative training with the mysterious R'as Al Ghul and then onto his return to Gotham. There he faces down his own personal demons and the very real threat of the returning R'as Al Ghul who he left for dead back in Tibet.

The special effects, such as they are, pass you by here and to me that's a good thing. You don't want a movie to become one where the main draw is the effects, just like in Independence Day. In some parts, especially after Bruce Wayne's return to Gotham, the movie does sag in parts but then again this film is not one that you can watch with your brain switch off. Batman Begins is an intelligent action film, but it is also a movie that examines the human condition and deals with topics like loss and revenge. The characters within are pretty much all judged well and highlights for me are Gary Oldman as James Gordon, the weary cop and Liam Neeson as R'as Al Ghul. Neeson adds a very malevolent air of menace to his character which is departure for him as he always seems to play nice guys.

This is a fantastic movie and a brilliant addition to the Batman canon.

Indiana Jones And The Kingdom of The Crystal Skull

As I have said before, Indiana Jones was a cinematic hero of mine when I was a child, and the last film, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade is easily on my fave films list. I've yet to review it but bear with me. This movie, was released in 2008, a full 19 years after the previous outing for our whip and wise cracking archaeologist.

Indy escapes from some pesky Russians at the start of the film and also narrowly escapes a nuclear blast at Area 51. We then cut to the college and Indy in his guise of a professor. He meets up with a motorbike riding young man and after yet another brush with the Reds they set off a quest to find out what has happened to a mutual friend and what a mysterious crystal skull and some aliens have to do with it all.

I had really high hopes for this film but maybe I should have learned my lesson from The Phantom Menace. This film is entertaining enough but it falls far, far short of the high standard set by all 3 previous outings, even Temple Of Doom. There are plus sides to it, like the pace of the storytelling not sagging and there are a couple of moments that make the hairs on your arms stand up but this movie is one that was released for no other reason than to cash in. I understand that a fourth film had been planned for years and should have come out not long after The Last Crusade but this effort just feels rushed.

A lot of what is in this movie was in one of the other three and that just smacks of laziness to me. Just for a short checklist to prove my point, and this is by no means an exhaustive list, here's some of the derivative tosh. The monkeys that Mutt swings along with in the trees? Those are the same species as the one from Raiders. In fact the chase sequence that bit appears in? That was in both Raiders and Last Crusade. The bit at the end where the heroes escape the temple by way of the water? Temple of Doom.

I could go on and on with that list but there's also the fact part of what made the previous movies so enthralling was the fact that the object that Indy was after was rooted in the real world. This time round he's after a crystal skull that has connections to some aliens. To me that's too much of a departure from the previous films. Also, the main twist in the film is blindingly obvious and some of the writing grates. The villains are lazy stereotypes of Russians and their leader, played by Cate Blanchett, comes straight from the Keanu Reeves school of non-acting.

This movie wont stomp all over your childhood dreams like Phantom Menace but neither will it seem like a worthy addition to the series. All in all it seems unnecessary and bodged. I hear that a fifth movie is in the pipeline. I sincerely hope they make a better job of that then they did with this.

Shanghai Knights

I've never been a man who learns from his mistakes easily and boy oh boy, did I ever fall prey to that here! This is the sequel to Shanghai Noon, a previous 'comedy' action film starring the laid back Owen Wilson and barely comprehensible Jackie Chan. That particular film was an irritatingly crap piece of cinema, the film equivalent of stubbing ones toe.

You would hope that this film improved on the original but unbelievably it's actually worse. This time Wilson's character is in New York and Chan's has somehow become Sheriff in Carson City. Chan's father is killed and the gruesome twosome rush to London where Chan's sister has sworn vengeance on their fathers killer. There's some nonsense about am Imperial Seal and a plot to kill the Royal Family and along the way the two (and then 3 when they meet up with the sister) meet Charlie Chaplin, Arthur Conan Doyle, Jack the Ripper and other assorted lazy Hollywood stereotypes of Londoners.

The main villain, who plots the downfall of Queen Victoria so he himself can assume the throne is so one dimensional he could have come straight from a book. The other Londoners on show are either stuck up toffs with barely a brain cell between them, gurning Cockney villains or maidens with black teeth. This movie is damned offensive to us Londoners! Come to think of it, this movie is offensive to anyone who actually enjoys being entertained.

There are plot holes and leaps of logic a-plenty here and whilst the movie is of an undemanding length you'll be left thinking 'why on earth have I just watched that tripe?"? Do yourself a favour and avoid this film, there are plenty of others that do mindless buddy action so much better than this piece of puerile trash.

Zombieland

Zombie films, whilst being a part of the horror genre, can be categorised into one of two sub-genres themselves. There's the zombie film that's played for scares and the one that's played for laughs. This movie falls very much into the second category.

Columbus is a college student who survives the zombie apocalypse by following his very anally retentive set of rules which make reappearances throughout the film. He hooks up with Tallahassee, played by Woody Harrelson, a redneck who survives by.... being a redneck! Tallahassee spends much of the film searching for his Holy Grail, a Twinkie bar. Along the way Columbus and Tallahassee meet up with Wichita and Little Rock, two sisters who before the zombies arose made their way by ripping off gullible men and they continue on their merry way here.

Our little group form a family of sorts, something which all them in one way or another had missing from their lives before the apocalypse. As they make their way across America, or Zombieland as it is referred to in the movie, they trash a trading post, dispatch Zombies in increasingly inventive ways and meet up with a rather famous person. That cameo, which I wont spoil, is easily one of the funniest things in this movie or any movie. This whole film had everyone in the cinema rocking with laughter and that's quite some achievement. The writing cracks and fizzles, the pace is hectic and there are touching and emotional moments amongst the laughs and gore. As well as laughs and occasional touching moments there are also moments that will have you whooping with glee, like Tallhassee's battle in the Fairground.

You totally and utterly buy into the 4 main characters, none of which use their actual names, instead they refer to each other by the names of their hometowns. Jesse Eisenberg is excellent as the nerdy Columbus, Woody Harrelson is fantastic as Tallahassee and the sisters are played by Emma Stone who manages to show a mix of toughness and vulnerability. Her sister is played by Abigail Breslin who is a revelation. Whilst in this film she is still obviously a kid she has a tough exterior but you do see glimpses of the child beneath if that's too Sidney a way of putting it.

This movie plays with your emotions, running the gamut mentioned above from amusement to fright to emotional jerks. This is not a zombie film of the like that Romero would do, rather it's a balls out and brazen ride through a wasted America. It's easily my favorite zombie film, and fits into m top 10 of fave films of all time and I can give it no higher praise than that.